Journal Entry #22

     To lose a person so dear to your heart is painful.  Sometimes words can not describe the sense of pain or loss or misery.  All of a sudden some one is gone and you have no power over that.  Who is to blame?  Should I blame the General for killing Mother Matriarch or should I blame her for betraying the General?  What if I was here and not in the forest?  Nami said that I could not blame anyone or anything.  Then she said I should remember Mother's life, to think of what I liked and loved about her, of how important she was.  Then Nami told me that I must remember her ways since I was to carry them on.  I was to be a peacemaker.  When new people arrived I had to welcome them and tell them our guidelines.  I had a new position which required much of my time.

     "We must grieve," said Nami, "...but King, you can not just sulk about.  You have to guide Latina Rey and you must keep your brother on track.  Just because Mother is no longer living does not mean we stop doing our duties."  I knew Nami suffered her own major loss but she was strong for me, I admired her for that.

     "Your right, Nami.  I must be strong for our family and community." 
     "You have a very strong heart and you are being guided.  Do you not remember our time in the forest?"
     "Yes, Nami, I remember."
     "And do you remember your true Mother and Father?"
     "Yes, Nami, I remember."
     "Then now you must ask them to take part in your life."
     "How?" I asked.
     "Well, you can do it alone or with me it does not matter.  But talk to them as if they are sitting right in front of you."
     "Talk to them?"
     "Yes, speak out loud.  Use your voice, they will listen."

     "Then they will be my personal mafia."

     "Ahhhh, you've been reading more complicated books."  Nami gave me a funny look, "Then let it be known that they are the King's mafia."  Just then I felt a great weight of responsibility dropping on my shoulders.

-------------------------->>>> to be continued.